Although my life is probably only half way through its course, the remaining chapters don’t particularly interest me. My soul yearns to return to its Author, where the book of life shall be explained and I will exist in a state of plenitude, tranquility and happiness. However, I have no say over how much time my Author has allotted me; but I must continue to play my part as the protagonist in this sorrowful story.
As I entered this realm and began playing out my character, I was still fresh from the divine Presence. But one loses the affinity with his or her Author upon getting too caught up in one’s own story.
My book, however, is a microcosm in the grand book of life, amounting to nothing more than a mere sentence. How I wish I could comprehend my own book let alone the grand book of life. The characters that I began with in my life are slowly disappearing, and returning to the Author who removed them from both my book as well as theirs. And with every day that passes, another page is turned and the end of the book gets closer and closer.
While it seems that my father’s book was not yet complete – dying only at 47 – every book has an end and every character finishes his or her story – no matter what age they depart.
Suicide is when one rips out the remaining pages of the book and, with it, rip themselves out – which is, of course, still part of the storyline. We cannot always understand why the Author, in His divine Imagination writes what He does, but we must accept it and upon returning to Him, all shall be revealed.
Life is like a game of chess and we, as an individual piece on the board, are free, in a limited sense. We must obey the rules set by the Creator of the game and we cannot transgress the limits set by the Creator – all our moves are therefore completely free yet completely determined. This is the paradox of our existence.
Sooner or later, we will be knocked off the board – sometimes we will know it is coming and other times we won’t. We will return with the other pieces with whom we started with who were on our side: our friends, our family. We will not return to the board: it was just a short-lived experience to see how we, in our limited movement, could survive in the game of games.
Be prepared to be knocked off the board at any time; we will return to the Creator of the game and the Author of our stories. From Him do we originate and to Him shall we ultimately return.